Here are a couple of definitions you might find useful:
Gender is the cultural definition of behavior defined as appropriate to the sexes in a given society at a given time. Gender is a set of cultural roles. It is a costume, a mask, a straitjacket in which men and women dance their unequal dance. Unfortunately, the term is used both in academic discourse and in the media as interchangeable with "sex." In fact, its widespread public use probably is due to it sounding a bit more "refined" than the plain word "sex"....Such usage is unfortunate, because it hides and mystifies the difference between the biological given - sex - and the culturally created - gender. Feminists above all others should want to point up that difference and should therefore be careful to use the appropriate words.
2) From The Gift by Lewis Hyde found in Chapter 6: “Female Property" in Section II: “Big Men and Little Women,” p. 103:
By “gender” I mean to indicate the cultural distinctions between male and female—not the physical signs of sex but that whole complex of activities, postures, speech patterns, attitudes, affects, acquisitions, and styles by virtue of which a woman becomes feminine (a man “effeminate”) and a man masculine (a woman “mannish”). Any system of gender will be connected to actual sexuality, of course, but that is only one of its possible connections. It may also support and affirm the local creation myth, perpetuate the exploitation of one sex by another, organize aggression and warfare, ensure the distribution of food from clan to clan—it may, in other words, serve any number of ends unrelated to actual sexuality.
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In my family, I was the first generation to be born in America. I've been exposed to the culture here and found it appropriate to thank people for something they've done for you. Sometimes, when I do sit down with my family to eat dinner, I notice that often, when my grandmother serves food to my grandfather, he never thanks her. He takes it as if it was her duty to serve him. From this, I could tell that it was the way gender was organized in his culture. Women were suppose to serve men, and I'm not sure whether or not it is right to correct him, to tell him he needs to thank her for what she does.
BrianT.
My family is also from another country and I was thinking the same thing as Brian T. My grandmother passed away about a little over two years ago and while she was alive, she always would say stuff like, a man will always be a man and women just have to let them be. I would hear her say rant and rave about how bad my grandfather treated her, but yet still at the end of the day she still had his dinner on the table.
Tamara P
An idea I've been thinking about is that this idea of gender was created because of mankind's need for meaning. Mankind must have felt that it needed to expect something from the different sexes of the species and created the phenomenon of gender.
The work of an ethnographer is perhaps to notice and record and ask questions but not to assume things are right or wrong.
Brian, you could ask about it but if you come from there is something wrong with it but it's how he learned to be in his culture, what do you think he might think you're really saying about him as a man, as a grandfather, as YOUR grandfather. What value could come from a conversation as an inquiry?
Hey I am learning about gender roles and stereotypes and you know what I noticed Grandfather? Share what you notice and ask questions. It may not be what it seems. Don't assume.
When I was taking the quiz, I found myself second guessing my answer between sex and gender. When I think about it now, on forms, questionnaires, and surveys they use the word sex. I realize now that being a man and being a woman depends on how you view yourself.
I find it funny when my mom lets her husband drive the car even when he doesn't know where to go. She feels it is a man's job to do the driving. When she goes to pick him up, he always drive back.
I think that many people confuse sex and gender because it is so easy to think of the two as either male or female, or both! i never completely focused on the fact that gender actually is used to indicate cultural distinctions BETWEEN male and female. After reading the chapter on gender and doing some searching on you tube i have noticed the overwhelming abundance of social norms for males and females living in our society. It bothers me that certain things a males and females do, which seem acceptable or the "norm", would be considered strange if certain roles were reversed. For example, my mother is a pre-school teacher, and the main care taker in most families is the mom. However, my mother has one child who's main caretaker is the father.The fact of the matter is, the mother of the family is a successful CEO and the father stays at home with the kids. I feel like many people would view this as not normal. But WHY isn't it normal?? Why is this social construct that women MUST stay at home while men go to work so predominant in our society? I even found myself shocked when my mom told me that he stays at home while the mother works, so i am just as guilty as relaying on the "norm", as anything other person might be.
On a daily basis, i question i the idea of gender and sex. I'm guilty of associating the two, but after reading the excerpt and chapter, I can see where distinctions can be made. The one thing that always baffles me about "gender" or "sex is the double standard in society; its ok for a man to do something and be praised yet if a woman were to do the same it is viewed negatively and vice versa.
The group presentation on this chapter really helped me see the way gender is portrayed in society. When the student stood up there and asked the class if they thought he was a man, most people said or thought that he wasn't. I was one of those people. But why did I think that? If a woman was to have done that part of the presentation, why would I think that she was "mannish", and the student "effeminate"? That's the whole idea behind gender. It's been socially engraved into my head.
Joel S.
To piggy back on what Sophia said, my mom would also in a sense have an idea, and translate it to my father so that he may be the one to voice it and take credit for it. I'm not quite sure how that works but for some reason it plays off really nicely with my mom getting her way and feeling as if he is the man who has the power and control. Or perhaps she's just feeding his ego?
Gender and Sex has been engraved into my head as something equal. To me, my sex depicts my gender which is given to me by my family. So in a sense, if Sex = Gender and Gender =Me, I am in essence my Sex.
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